You Wanna Be On Top?

So last night involved a bit too much drinking. It came out of nowhere. I really didn't think that it would happen. But it did.

Of course, when do I ever know that it will happen. Sure, there are some nights where I absolutely plan on drinking myself in to oblivion. Last night, however, it was an accident. God damn Carlo Rossi and his reasonably priced selection of 12% by volume red wines. Bastard!

All that drinking led to another one of the oh-so-fun sociopolitical arguments that I can't help but get involved with. Sadly, however, I was very drunk so I was not so receptive to some of the ideas that were put forth in the conversation. Anyone that knows me knows that the drunk, argumentative side of Andrew is not necessarily that fun. Or any fun, really. I'm kind of an asshole when I get in to an argument and feel like I am being cornered. For some reason I feel like if it's 3 vs 1 then I have to make up for being on the short side.

And it makes me a complete dick.

So, with that, I'm really sorry, guys. I know I can't be like that all the time, and I don't know why I always seem to be the oddball out when it comes to an argument, but it is definitely something that I need to work on. After all, I can't just go alienating all of my friends with my hyper-condescending, crazy views. Again, sorry. I'll try to be better.

As crazy as the night was, today has been deliriously crazy. I have spent almost all day watching girls who want nothing more than to be on top. On top of what, you ask. Well, on top of the modeling world. That's right. I have been watching the weeklong marathon of America's Next Top Model for hours and hours and hours. First, I spent three hours hating Monique. Then I spent the rest of my day hating Melrose. Now, Michelle has just told the people in the house that she is gay and she just told her mom on the phone, following it up with a, "happy mother's day!" Oh lesbians and your lack of tact.

YES! I managed to sneak in a stereotype! Not just any stereotype, but one I just made up! I know I had promised that this time around my racist rant would be about the hispanics but nothing has really happened of note to inspire offensive commentary. Lesbian friends...sorry.

Now, I know it sounds strange that I have done nothing all day but watch such a shitty (read: fantastic, and there is nothing you can say about it to make me change my mind) show, but I have an excuse: I'm sick. That's right. I'm fucking sick. I know, I know. "You drank too much last night blah blah." Nope, sorry. That really doesn't have anything to do with it. I wasn't so drunk that I would still be throwing up at 7 at night. That, and drinking is not a fever inducer. This is a bonafide flu, and not just any flu. This is that awful flu that has been going around, infecting the world, causing mass call-outs to Banana Republic, forcing others (cough, cough...me....cough, cough) to work twice as hard. At least I got sick on my day off.

God, I can't believe I just said that.

All of this sickness had nothing to do but lead to a blog. At a certain point, ANTM just doesn't provide the necessary entertainment when puking. I guess now all that is left to do is go attempt to keep something down and eat some crackers or something.

Have a great night, all you non-sickies!